A Day at the VA

After angrily arriving at the VA in Nashville, I was told I had pretty hair. That simple comment calmed me down after sitting in rush hour for 1.5 hours (which i'm sure 1.5 hours of rush hour in my air conditioned vehicle is much better than any mode of transportation in moz). Parking was intense. I pretty much played follow the leader until I found an open spot. Once inside I easily found the business office and signed in. There was an old woman knitting in waiting room who kept staring at me like i
didn't belong. How could she guess?

Once they called me back I was told "I didn't look military" when they asked for some id number and I had an confusing blank look on my face. What I'm wondering is why I don't look military???? Part of me was offended, but I got over it. I was flirted with by the guy doing my application even though he and no one else knew what to do with me (what's new?) because I'm not a veteran. Peace Corp appears to confuse everyone.

After leaving there I was on my way to employee health. There were old men filling the hallways. Most with walkers and wheelchairs and others moving at a pace less than fast. Many of the men had arms decorated with tattoos. Other had women who I would guess to be their wives. I seemed to be the only one who had no idea where they were going and I think they knew.

On the way an old man with a cane twice my size in height and weight asked what i was doing here. (Was it that noticeable I was out of place??) Confused as to why it was his business i told him i had to get some Peace Corp labs. He then told me that I was doing a good thing and just walked away......

Once I found employee health the guy at the desk sounded like Morgan Freeman and it made me laugh every time he would talk. He sounded like God from Even and Bruce Almighty. While waiting to be called back from my labs I picked the best hiding spot in case a killer was on the loose (hospitals have a new meaning to them now that I've watched the Greys anatomy finale...hopefully the VA won't turn into Seattle Grace) My hiding spot consisted of two options: breaking glass and going out the window or ducking in the nearest exam room and going in a cabinet. Neither one seemed promising.

Once my labs were ordered I was told to go to the lab area. Let me just explain this. The lab area is FILLED with old men waiting to get lab work. People are all over the hallways lining both sides and I was clueless if and how to check in. About 4 people at once realized that and shouted for me to grab a buzzer and tag with a number on it. It's like waiting to get a seat at a restaraunt!

I proceeded to sit down because there were signs all across the hallway saying don't stand in the hallway even though people are doing it anyway. I'm going to try to piss of the least amount of people I can.

At the employee health I found out I can't get a polio titer, I have to get a shot...which is $50. Grr. That is $50 I don't have, but anything for the Peace Corp. I should have been done today! Oh and some form of lab work takes a long time to get back. Great. More waiting. Patience and flexibility. :)

Have I mentioned this entire "trip" I have had a bad case of the giggles? Everything makes me want to laugh and I'm not sure if it's the fact I realize everyone knows I'm lost or if its the old man with walking farts who had a cotton ball fall out of his
pants...

After all my labs were done and some more paperwork to fill out I was finally free to go. They only took three tubes of blood...which freaked me out because I had 7 labs that were supposed to be done...I did my best to get myself out of the maze I was in. With all that being said, it was really cool to see so many veterans in one place. Being the journalist guru I am, I wanted to ask everyone what their story was. Where, when and why they served and all the details that come with it, but instead I kept my mouth shut and had the most interesting day ever.